Tantrums are expressions of frustration or rage that show themselves in children usually between the ages of two and four. A Tantrum is a demand for attention that only works when the parent is embarrassed or intimated enough to give in to the child’s demands.
Therefore it makes sense to keep away from the child until the tantrum has stopped. If you are at home one of the best ways to do this is to just walk away and get on with other things, such as housework, as noisily as you can, getting the hoover out is a good example! Putting the radio on and singing along to the music is another. Try not to look angry or unsettled by the behaviour. Try to act as if everything is fine in your world. The child will soon abandon this as an unsuccessful technique.
It’s important to remember that although tantrums are scary it is unlikely that the child will hurt themselves. They may hold their breath and bang themselves on the floor but if you stay calm no real harm should come to them.
Handling tantrums when you are out is much harder to do. We have all seen children in supermarkets in the throws of a tantrum and the disapproving looks of the other shoppers could easily cause you to give in just to save face. Try not to. The best way, although incredibly inconvenient is to leave the shop (taking your child with you of course!) and go straight home where you can get the hoover out or put the tv on!
At this age it is hard to reason with your child, they are unable to express themselves very well or understand your explanations that this is not the way to do things. Far better to show them, calmly, that this simply doesn’t work.
However, l do believe that the majority of tantrums can be avoided with a little careful planning. Try to avoid taking your child out to a busy supermarket at the time of day when they would usually be having a nap for example. A lot of children are simply overtired and cannot handle the change to their routine. Children also get cranky when they are hungry, if you know you are going to be out during a meal time take a little something for them to nibble on (a rusk or a few grapes). Remember that small children thrive on routine and function best within this.
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