Jack's mom is not alone. Toddlers are notorious for temper-tantrums and loud outbursts. But what can be done, and how do you discipline your child in front of sixteen shoppers and four store clerks?
Children begin to assert their independence as early as one year old. By this time, they have figured out that they are a separate person from their parents, and that they can actually choose what they do - whether to do what you tell them, or do what they feel like doing. Some children grow out of this stage quickly - others take several years. No matter how old your child is, temper-tantrums and fits can't be ignored. Nor should you simply do whatever the kid wants, in order to get him to shut up!
Establish and Manage Expectations
Sometimes kids misbehave because they simply don't know what's expected. Before going into a store, you might tell your youngster, "We're going into the store now, and you need to sit quietly in the cart. If you want to tell me some funny stories while we shop, that would be great! We won't cry or have tantrums, because then we'll have to leave." Make sure you manage your time in the store appropriately for your child's age.
He shouldn't be hungry or tired when you shop. And you probably can't expect him to happily sit in a shopping cart for two hours. Engage him and talk to him while you're in the store. And, if he throws a fit, leave your cart sitting there and leave. This can be difficult when you need to get the shopping done, but if he knows you're serious about leaving if he displays inappropriate behavior, he'll be more likely to behave on the next trip.
Offer Alternatives
"When Jack wants something he can't have, like scissors, for instance, I hand him something else," says his mom. This doesn't always work, but sometimes if you can provide your child with something that looks just as good, or better, they'll accept the alternative.
Keep 'em Busy
Bored kids can be more prone to look for trouble, or have a meltdown. Keep lots of appropriate activities at hand, especially in situations that call for "best behavior." At church, in the store or at a restaurant, bring small toys, coloring books or snacks. If there are fun things around to do that won't get them into trouble, they'll be less likely to find all the things they can't have.
A Structured Environment
Kids like to know what's going to happen next, and they'll benefit greatly from a basic schedule. You might plan a shopping trip right after morning nap and lunch, when your toddler is well-rested and fed. A regular bedtime is important, too. Trying to dine out with a tired toddler after bedtime is a disaster, and makes for a stressful meal for both you and the other patrons at the restaurant!
You're in Charge
One of the worst things you can do in the middle of a tantrum is to give the child what he wants. This sets a precedence for more bad behavior, because you've actually rewarded the child for throwing himself down and screaming. He learns that, when you say "no" you only mean it until he screams, then he gets what he wants. Even though initially, it can be more work to stick to your resolve, in the end your discipline problems will be fewer because your child will know it just won't work.
Try re-directing your child when he can't have or do what he wants. Say, "Let's get a new idea. What fun thing can we think of now?
Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/tips-on-toddler-discipline-1532234.html#ixzz0mKhVvLyq
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